I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
