This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
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