It's like God shit irony all over that family
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
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