Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Sober January is a disaster.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize