Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
this hospital has no fireball
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
