North Korea, Best Korea!
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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