So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.