I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Randomize