I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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