I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
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