just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize
