i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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