whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
