I feel like I'm in dance class right now
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
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