My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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