Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
This is my gift to your gina
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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