the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
