Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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