I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize
