I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize