I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
