New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize
