Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
