I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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