You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.