Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.