he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
