you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
