did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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