3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
me + whiskey = a bad person
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
