Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Randomize
