Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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