no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I need moral support for this bender
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize