her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
