I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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