i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
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