it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
