Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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