Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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