I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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