is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
