just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
