I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
