then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
At least make sure they are 18
Why
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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