Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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