just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize
