They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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