I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
