How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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