We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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