i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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