Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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