Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
