The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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